1. |
Entrance Music
01:13
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2. |
Assumin' It's Human
04:03
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Assumin’ its Human
Mysterious to me with hints of danger
I’m assumin’ its human after all
Any excuse in the book is good enough
Avoidance isn’t an option even if it isn’t love
Remember me when I fall won’t you – I can win or lose
It’s not the second coming so don’t trip over your shoes
Underneath the surface there may be something divine
For you to find
Tiny details stick to the lack of silence
I’m assumin’ its human after all
I find myself searching for a sign
Anything at all to claim you as mine
Remember me when you’re getting the third degree
No better way to recycle all this unused flattery
Underneath the pressure there is very little time
It’s so unkind
Reciprocate – reciprocate
It’s not too late – it’s not late no
Although I try I struggle but not in vain
Far too much to lose not enough to gain
It’s not enough!
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3. |
Friday Trousers
03:03
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Friday Trousers
There was a feeling I borrowed from you
You wanted second hand but bought it new
And though this feeling started out true
I got the meaning then proceeded to lose
I come alive – so many suitable reasons
I come alive – you were the only one
I come alive – don’t even think about leaving
I want to reach inside
I can recall a time when I would wear
My Friday Trousers everywhere
But the other day I discovered a tear
They’d be so difficult to replace or repair
I come alive – there are no other ones like you
I come alive – nothing will ever come close
I come alive – the hole just keeps getting bigger
You don’t have much time left
Now I don’t feel the same
I don’t react well to change
She holds the bin open
I wonder what will I do?
Such a perfect fit
I love the way they caress my body
They’ll soon be off to that great wardrobe in the sky
I come alive – there are no other ones like you
I come alive – nothing will ever come close
I come alive – the hole just keeps getting bigger
You don’t have much time left
Now I don’t feel the same
I don’t react well to change
She holds the bin open
I wonder what will I do?
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4. |
Selfie-Song
02:22
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Selfie-Song
I take the same picture again and again
It’s still not improving
I take the same picture ‘cause I feel the same
I’m still not moving
On every mobile a selfie, mobile a selfie
Mobile a selfie – who?
On every mobile a selfie, mobile a selfie
Mobile a selfie – you!
Am I somehow immune to this obsession with myself?
Time will tell
Do it again – Do it again
I take the same picture a million times
I’ll make it an artform
I share the same picture when I go online
And nobody’s liked it yet
On every mobile a selfie, mobile a selfie
Mobile a selfie – who?
On every mobile a selfie, mobile a selfie
Mobile a selfie – you!
Am I losing my touch or am I caring too much?
It can’t be helped – I blame myself
Do it again – Do it again
Face to face with your fears
At the mercy of your peers
I take the same picture again and again
It’s still not improving
I take the same picture ‘cause I feel the same
I’m still not moving
On every mobile a selfie, mobile a selfie
Mobile a selfie – who?
On every mobile a selfie, mobile a selfie
Mobile a selfie – you!
Am I somehow immune to this obsession with myself?
Time will tell
Do it again – Do it again
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5. |
These Infernal Emotions
02:59
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These Infernal Emotions
I try to hide my disappointment
With a mediocre smile
The jealousy never really goes away,
What’s the opposite of regret?
So I know I know if I’ve felt it yet
Goodbyes are much harder than apologies
These infernal emotions
Just make my list longer
Don’t know if help is necessary
To uncover something hidden
Always expecting to be judged
Always imagine the worst
Nothing but bad memories, sweet sadness and profound pain,
I have noticed your appeal
There’s nothing wrong with that at all
But nobody can see me to give me the time
Flattery is poison
And I don’t have the cure
You know that people are a hazard
I’m surprised you didn’t know that
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6. |
Cloudmachine
03:04
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Cloudmachine
In a field of green
Enthralled to the Cloudmachine
A borrowed memory
I try my best to picture the scene
Though not afraid to ask
I find this image fading fast
Into the past I fell
Imagination serves me well
Oh I can see it clear
Such a thing to share
Oh I can see it clear
Such a thing to share
Oh I can see it clear
Such a thing to share
I feel like I’m there
Such a thing to share…
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7. |
Landscape Mode
03:03
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8. |
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All Dressed Up & Nowhere To Go
I found a window in my diary
Time to myself is a finite luxury
Shaved my legs and shaved my face
So bring on the satin, bring on the lace uh huh huh
I’ll draw the curtains and the blinds real tight
I don’t anyone to see me tonight
You ask me why my heels are high
And why I can’t just be a guy
Do my eyeliner with particular care
I’m getting better – now what should I wear?
The transformation is almost complete
I bet you didn’t think I could look this sweet uh huh huh
Another choice now – redhead or brunette?
I’m going to be the hottest girl you never met
I’m very grateful and feel very blessed
To get to lounge around in my favourite dress
I’ve got nowhere to go
I’ve got nowhere to go
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9. |
Already Said Goodbye
03:15
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Already Said Goodbye
Since I went away I’m miserable
Hard to console
Accurate portrayal reflecting the lie
Already said goodbye,
Leave everything until the last minute
And I disappear
Everything’s new to someone
Even me – a post-modern fuck-up
Relearning a craft from a parody
It passes you by, that’s why you don’t reply,
A sombre mood is my moment of clarity
That’s how things land
I shouldn’t have told you I was the one to blame
Different people don’t always think the same
No flesh on the bone
A dreadful mistake – instant regret
Open heart closed mind
The point is missed – it’s like it didn’t exist,
The questions won’t be asked till everyone
Has gone to sleep
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10. |
Bonus Sausage
02:49
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Bonus Sausage
Oh canteen lady you’re so good
Oh canteen lady when I need food
Oh canteen lady I must pay you homage
For you always give me an extra sausage
I count my sausages one two three
I look at you – you look at me
I count my sausages one two three
As I only get two normally
Oh oh oooh!
Oh canteen lady I’m just a man
There’s many things I don’t understand
Like measurements, weights, centimetres and feet
And why I keep on coming back for your processed meat
I count my sausages un deux trios
Then you ask me if I want butter with that
I count my sausages crisp and brown
Before I smother them with ketchup and I gobble them down
Oh oh oooh!
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11. |
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Tidy Fool (Smart Edition)
To find a redeemer is hard enough
A million eyes for a sky like blood
I was dreaming I found something
But then again it may be nothing
To find a redeemer is hard I know
But we must never let it show
Now I see you in the water
Who will keep you saddest daughter?
But you say nothing
Nothing – nothing at all (4x)
I’m so stupid for your smile
Sit tight, indulge me for a while
Constant changes bring her nearer
I will save you doubt it never
But you say nothing
Nothing – nothing at all (4x)
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12. |
Attitude Ogre
03:44
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Attitude Ogre
When the cold air hits your lungs
In the morning – in the morning
You realise your troubles have begun
In the morning – in the morning
Feels like the last pages
Are getting closer – getting closer
The onset of another one of your famous rages
Crack me up crack me down I’m an attitude ogre
Crack me up crack me down I’m an attitude ogre
When the calculations are fucked
Nothings working – nothings working
Stand back ‘cause I’m going to erupt
Nothings working – nothings working
You can’t stand to pretend failure
I couldn’t do it – I couldn’t do it
Hope there’s nothing nearby for you to smash & tear
Smash & tear!
Crack me up crack me down I’m an attitude ogre
Crack me up crack me down I’m an attitude ogre
Another day in the life of an attitude ogre
Misplaced keys = social disease for the ogre attitudinal
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13. |
Secret Sick
00:34
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Secret Sick
Secret sick secret sick
My least favourite kind of sick
Secret sick secret sick
My least favourite kind of sick
Secret sick secret sick
My least favourite kind of sick
My least favourite kind of sick
So don’t you go being secretly sick on me
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Chairman Cow Glasgow, UK
Good old fashioned homemade Rock music made primarily because I have to or my brain will explode. I have gone by many names over the years and most of them can be found here in one handy location.
Chairman Cow recommends:
Couldn't recommend simply one that would be unfair - dip in and hear!
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